Two hours before curtain, Greer opened her mouth in the dressing room and nothing came out except a dry whisper.
开演前两个小时，格里尔在化妆间里张开嘴，除了一丝干涩的气声，什么也发不出来。
Alder was eating a sandwich in the corridor, with a script open on her knee that she hadn't looked at in weeks. Understudies, she had always told herself, were insurance that nobody ever claimed.
奥尔德正坐在走廊里吃三明治，膝盖上摊着一本好几个星期没翻过的剧本。她一直对自己说，替补演员就是一份没人会来领取的保险。
Then the director came running, and the school nurse peered into Greer's throat and said the word "rest." By the time Alder had finished chewing, the decision had been made.
接着导演跑了过来，学校的护士往格里尔喉咙里看了看，说了个词：“休息”。等奥尔德嚼完嘴里的东西，决定已经做出来了。
"You're on tonight," the director said. "You know every line. You have been mouthing them from the back row since September."
“今晚你上，”导演说，“你每一句台词都会。从九月起你就一直在后排对着口型。”
"That's not the same as saying them out loud," Alder said. Her voice sounded smaller than she wanted it to.
“对着口型和大声说出来可不一样。”奥尔德说。她的声音听上去比她希望的要小。
Greer found her ten minutes later. She sat on the floor beside her, tore a page from a notebook and began writing in thick black marker. When she had finished, she held up the first card. It read: I'LL BE IN THE WINGS. LOOK AT ME IF YOU GET LOST.
十分钟后，格里尔找到了她。她在她旁边的地板上坐下，从笔记本上撕下一页纸，用粗粗的黑色记号笔写起来。写完之后，她举起第一张卡片。上面写着：我会在侧幕。迷路了就看我。
She taught Alder a code with her hands. A flat palm lowered slowly meant slow down. A hand cupped behind her ear meant listen to your scene partner, not to your own panic.
她教奥尔德用手打暗号。一只平放的手掌慢慢放低，意思是慢一点。一只手拢在耳后，意思是听你的对手戏搭档，别听你自己的慌张。
The curtain went up at seven. In the first scene Alder spoke too fast, and her hands shook so hard that the prop teacup rattled against its saucer. From the wings, a flat palm sank toward the floor.
幕布在七点拉开。第一场里，奥尔德说得太快，手抖得厉害，道具茶杯在茶碟上咔咔作响。从侧幕那边，一只平放的手掌朝地面沉下去。
Alder slowed down. The audience laughed at the line that was supposed to be funny. It was the first time all evening that she could hear her own breathing.
奥尔德放慢了速度。观众在那句本该好笑的台词上笑了。这是整晚她第一次听见自己的呼吸。
In the second act, her mind went completely white. Somewhere in the dark, a card appeared at the edge of the curtain with one word on it: WHENEVER. It was exactly the word she needed, and the rest of the sentence followed it out of her mouth.
第二幕里，她的脑子一片空白。黑暗中的某处，幕布边缘出现了一张卡片，上面只有一个词：无论何时。那正是她需要的词，句子的其余部分就跟着它从她嘴里出来了。
At the interval, Greer pressed another card into her hand. It said: YOU ARE NOT ME. GOOD.
中场休息时，格里尔又塞给她一张卡片。上面写着：你不是我。很好。
By the final scene, Alder had stopped looking toward the wings at all. She had been so busy living inside the story that she had almost forgotten anyone was watching.
到了最后一场，奥尔德已经完全不再朝侧幕看了。她太专注于活在故事里，几乎忘了有人在看。
When the lights came up for the bows, the audience got to its feet. The rest of the cast pulled Alder into the center of the line. She saw that the hem of her costume was still held together with a safety pin that Greer had fastened in a hurry.
谢幕灯亮起时，观众都站了起来。其余演员把奥尔德拉到了队伍中央。她看见自己戏服的下摆，还用一枚别针别着，那是格里尔匆忙别上去的。
She glanced toward the wings one last time. Greer was standing there with a card she must have written earlier and not used. It read BOW LOW, and the words had been underlined twice in green.
她最后一次朝侧幕望去。格里尔站在那里，手里举着一张她肯定早先写好却没用上的卡片。上面写着：鞠躬要深，这几个字下面用绿色划了两道线。
Alder bowed so low that her hair touched her knees.
奥尔德鞠躬鞠得那么低，头发都碰到了膝盖。
