Cassius had been swimming competitively since he was eight. For the last two years, every conversation about his future had started with the word "scholarship." His times had been watched by college coaches for over a year. His own coach, Bao, had built an entire training plan around the state qualifying meet in the spring.
卡修斯从八岁起就参加游泳比赛。过去两年里，每一次谈到他的未来，开头都是“奖学金”这个词。大学教练们盯着他的成绩已经超过一年。他自己的教练鲍，围绕春季的全州资格赛制定了整套训练计划。
What nobody knew was that Cassius had spent most of his free time that winter in the empty band room. There, he taught himself piano from videos online. He had never told Bao. He hadn't even told his best friend Minh, who swam in the lane beside his every single morning.
没有人知道的是，那个冬天，卡修斯大部分空闲时间都待在空荡荡的乐队排练室里。在那里，他对着网上的视频自学钢琴。他从没告诉过鲍。甚至没告诉过他最好的朋友明，明每天早晨都在他旁边的泳道游泳。
At the qualifying meet, Cassius false-started in his best event, the one that mattered most for his scholarship times. It was a mistake he hadn't made since he was twelve, and everyone in the building noticed it.
在资格赛上，卡修斯在他最强的项目里抢跳了，那是对他的奖学金成绩最关键的项目。这种错误他从十二岁起就没犯过，全场的人都看到了。
Bao pulled him aside afterward, more confused than angry, and told him plainly that this hadn't looked like nerves. He said Cassius had swum through worse pressure than this before, so something else had to be going on.
事后，鲍把他拉到一旁，与其说生气，不如说困惑，直截了当地告诉他，这不像是紧张。他说卡修斯以前游过比这更大的压力，所以一定还有别的事。
Cassius almost denied it, the way he had been denying it to himself for months. Instead, he told Bao about the piano, the videos, and the quiet hour he spent most nights composing short, unfinished pieces nobody had heard.
卡修斯差点否认，就像他几个月来对自己否认的那样。可他还是把钢琴、那些视频，以及他几乎每晚花一个安静的小时创作那些没人听过的、没写完的小曲子，都告诉了鲍。
"I should have told you about this months earlier, before it turned into something I was hiding," Cassius admitted. "I was afraid you'd tell me to choose."
“我应该在几个月前就告诉你的，在它变成我隐瞒的事情之前，”卡修斯承认道，“我怕你会叫我选一个。”
If Bao insisted on a full schedule again, Cassius already knew he would find the hours for piano anyway. However, Bao was quiet for a moment, turning the idea over. "I'm not going to pretend the scholarship doesn't matter," he said. "But you can't keep splitting yourself in half and expect either side to get your best."
如果鲍再次坚持排满训练，卡修斯早就知道，自己无论如何都会挤出时间练钢琴。不过，鲍沉默了一会儿，在琢磨这个想法。“我不会假装奖学金不重要，”他说，“但你不能一直把自己劈成两半，却指望哪一半都能拿出你最好的状态。”
Together, they worked out a lighter schedule for the following month, one that left Cassius two evenings a week that belonged only to the piano. The next morning, Minh asked why he looked so tired, and for once, Cassius told him the truth.
他们一起为接下来的一个月制定了一份较轻的日程，每周留出两个晚上，只属于钢琴。第二天早上，明问他为什么看起来这么累，这一次，卡修斯对他说了实话。
