The Apprenticeship Letter

Lucia had worked behind the bakery counter every morning since she was fourteen. At first it was a favor to her mother; later, it simply became her life. The bell above the door and the smell of proving dough had become as familiar as breathing. So had the regulars who ordered the same thing every day.

Lucia sudah bekerja di balik konter toko roti setiap pagi sejak usia empat belas tahun. Awalnya itu hanya membantu ibunya; belakangan, itu menjadi hidupnya. Lonceng di atas pintu dan aroma adonan yang mengembang sudah semudah bernapas baginya. Begitu juga para pelanggan tetap yang memesan hal yang sama setiap hari.

She had also, quietly and without telling anyone, been sending her design portfolio to studios in other cities for almost a year. Most had never replied. One, in a city six hours away, finally did.

Ia juga, diam-diam dan tanpa memberi tahu siapa pun, hampir setahun mengirim portofolio desainnya ke berbagai studio di kota lain. Kebanyakan tak pernah membalas. Satu, di sebuah kota enam jam jauhnya, akhirnya membalas.

The email arrived on an ordinary Thursday morning, while Lucia was restocking the pastry case. It offered her a paid twelve-month apprenticeship, starting in six weeks, working under a designer whose work she had admired for years. The apprenticeship had been offered to only one applicant that year, and somehow it was her.

Surel itu tiba pada Kamis pagi yang biasa, ketika Lucia sedang mengisi ulang etalase kue. Isinya tawaran magang berbayar selama dua belas bulan, dimulai enam minggu lagi, di bawah seorang desainer yang karyanya sudah ia kagumi bertahun-tahun. Magang itu hanya ditawarkan kepada satu pelamar tahun itu, dan entah bagaimana orangnya adalah dirinya.

Her mother had told her, more than once, that the shop would be hers eventually, the way it had once been her own mother's. She had simply assumed Lucia agreed, the way people assume a river will keep flowing the direction it always has.

Ibunya sudah berkali-kali berkata bahwa toko itu pada akhirnya akan menjadi miliknya, seperti dulu toko itu milik ibunya sendiri. Ia sekadar berasumsi Lucia setuju, seperti orang mengira sungai akan terus mengalir ke arah yang selalu dilaluinya.

If Lucia accepted the apprenticeship, her mother would have to hire someone else, and quickly. If she turned it down, she suspected an offer like this wouldn't come around again. Neither option felt simple, and she was tired of pretending that it did.

Kalau Lucia menerima magang itu, ibunya harus mencari pengganti, dan cepat. Kalau ia menolaknya, ia curiga tawaran seperti ini tak akan datang lagi. Tak satu pun pilihan terasa sederhana, dan ia sudah lelah berpura-pura bahwa itu sederhana.

That evening, she watched her mother close out the register, counting coins into neat paper rolls the way she had for twenty years. Meanwhile, the bakery kept running exactly as it always had, as if nothing had changed at all.

Malam itu, ia memperhatikan ibunya menutup mesin kasir, menggulung koin ke dalam gulungan kertas yang rapi seperti yang sudah dilakukannya selama dua puluh tahun. Sementara itu, toko roti berjalan persis seperti biasanya, seolah tak ada yang berubah sama sekali.

She should have told her mother about the applications months ago, before the decision arrived all at once like this. She didn't say anything about the email that night. Instead, she went upstairs, pulled an old duffel bag down from the closet, and set it open on her bed. She didn't pack anything yet. She just sat there for a while, looking at the empty bag, letting herself imagine what it might hold.

Seharusnya ia memberi tahu ibunya soal lamaran-lamaran itu berbulan-bulan lalu, sebelum keputusan itu datang sekaligus seperti ini. Malam itu ia tidak mengatakan apa-apa tentang surel itu. Sebaliknya, ia naik ke lantai atas, menarik turun sebuah tas duffel tua dari lemari, dan membukanya di atas tempat tidur. Ia belum mengemas apa pun. Ia hanya duduk di sana beberapa lama, menatap tas kosong itu, membiarkan dirinya membayangkan apa yang mungkin akan diisikan ke dalamnya.